I've been mentally preparing for this day for quite some time now, but still it feels so surreal. My dreams of living outside California are finally coming true, and it is certainly bittersweet.
When I first got my leave papers approved from LAUSD, I felt a touch of sadness wash over me. Reality began to hit home and I realized that I would be leaving my family, my friends, and the life I knew and loved. At the same time, I also knew I needed to take that risk and walk through another door in my life. It's so easy to become complacent and comfortable with the way things are. I think I would have been very happy to continue with a successful career in teaching, perhaps become a homeowner, and start a family... but in the back of my head, I always knew this day was coming. I knew what I was getting into when I married Scott. To say that he is ambitious is quite the understatement.
Despite the fact that I've long thought about pursuing another career and moving across the country, I never really had the guts to take either of those risks. In fact, it was only just a year ago that I began to realize it might actually happen whether I liked it or not. We have discussed the possibility of him going back to school for an MBA for years, and to tell you the truth, I selfishly hoped that his desire would fade with time. Who was I kidding? Scott had decided to apply to four business schools, and three of them weren't even in California! The one that was in California was also 6 hours away from home, so that meant big changes were in store for us. I had to start preparing, at least mentally.
I groaned when I heard the choices, and I have to tell you that Chicago was at the bottom of the list for me. I had never been there before, but I just knew I didn't want to go there. At one point, I think I may have even told him not to bother applying because I was certain I would hate it. Then I just became so aggravated at the thought of all this change and promised him that I wouldn't make my decision until I visited the school myself. Looking back, it seemed like I could buy myself a bit of time (at least until the acceptance- or rejection- letters started coming in). There was no point in stressing out about an option that wasn't really an option. Since all of the schools he applied to were difficult to get into, I knew there was a chance that he would not be accepted into any of them... be that as it may, I still stressed out about my future.
The whole application process was such a learning experience for me. Even though I wasn't technically the one applying to the schools, it was very important to Scott that I would feel comfortable there too. What was the environment like for spouses? Would I like the area enough to live there comfortably for two years? There was so much to research, and so much I didn't know.
By the time Scott started hearing from schools, I was definitely on edge. Is this what it feels like when mothers wait for their children to hear back from colleges? I seemed to be a lot more emotional than Scott (either that or he was really good at hiding it from me), and I surprisingly took the rejection hard and quite personally.
I wish I could tell you that I was jumping for joy when Scott called to tell me he got into Kellogg, but I wasn't. He was so excited, and I was relieved that he got in because I knew how much he wanted to go there. We even found out that he was offered an incredible scholarship (the F.C. Austin Scholarship, which is merit-based and given to only 20 students in an enormous incoming class).
Despite all this great news, I still had mixed feelings about picking up and leaving my life in LA. I remember the day when he asked me if I could go to DAK (Day at Kellogg) with him, which was an admitted students weekend. I wasn't thrilled about going in the first place, and it didn't help that it was during the same weekend that I was co-hosting one of my best friend's bridal shower. To make a long story short, I wasn't sold on Kellogg yet.
Thanks to a few twists of fate and a completely understanding and supportive friend, I ended up spending the entire weekend in Evanston to see if I could imagine myself living there for two years. It wasn't an easy decision-- I felt horrible about missing such an important event for my friend, but honestly, I'm so glad I didn't miss DAK because it was the major turning point for me.
Here are a few things I learned that weekend:
1. Kellogg wasn't in Chicago! It was in Evanston, a town I had never even heard of until then.
2. It was clean and extremely beautiful.
3. Midwesterners are all SUPER NICE! (Seriously, even the bums are nice)
4. How Kellogg does such an incredible job embracing the JV community (JV= JointVenture aka significant others). There were so many separate activities I was involved in all weekend. If ever I needed a support group, this would be it. I liked all the girls I met, and I knew that being active in this type of community would help the transition immensely.
5. I could afford a nice apartment with a doorman. Yes, this was very exciting to me.
I could probably write a whole entry about my experience at DAK, but all you need to know is that I was sold. I fell in love with the campus, the community, and the whole Evanston vibe. Slowly but surely, Kellogg climbed its way to the top of the list.
Despite the fact that I've long thought about pursuing another career and moving across the country, I never really had the guts to take either of those risks. In fact, it was only just a year ago that I began to realize it might actually happen whether I liked it or not. We have discussed the possibility of him going back to school for an MBA for years, and to tell you the truth, I selfishly hoped that his desire would fade with time. Who was I kidding? Scott had decided to apply to four business schools, and three of them weren't even in California! The one that was in California was also 6 hours away from home, so that meant big changes were in store for us. I had to start preparing, at least mentally.
I groaned when I heard the choices, and I have to tell you that Chicago was at the bottom of the list for me. I had never been there before, but I just knew I didn't want to go there. At one point, I think I may have even told him not to bother applying because I was certain I would hate it. Then I just became so aggravated at the thought of all this change and promised him that I wouldn't make my decision until I visited the school myself. Looking back, it seemed like I could buy myself a bit of time (at least until the acceptance- or rejection- letters started coming in). There was no point in stressing out about an option that wasn't really an option. Since all of the schools he applied to were difficult to get into, I knew there was a chance that he would not be accepted into any of them... be that as it may, I still stressed out about my future.
The whole application process was such a learning experience for me. Even though I wasn't technically the one applying to the schools, it was very important to Scott that I would feel comfortable there too. What was the environment like for spouses? Would I like the area enough to live there comfortably for two years? There was so much to research, and so much I didn't know.
By the time Scott started hearing from schools, I was definitely on edge. Is this what it feels like when mothers wait for their children to hear back from colleges? I seemed to be a lot more emotional than Scott (either that or he was really good at hiding it from me), and I surprisingly took the rejection hard and quite personally.
I wish I could tell you that I was jumping for joy when Scott called to tell me he got into Kellogg, but I wasn't. He was so excited, and I was relieved that he got in because I knew how much he wanted to go there. We even found out that he was offered an incredible scholarship (the F.C. Austin Scholarship, which is merit-based and given to only 20 students in an enormous incoming class).
Despite all this great news, I still had mixed feelings about picking up and leaving my life in LA. I remember the day when he asked me if I could go to DAK (Day at Kellogg) with him, which was an admitted students weekend. I wasn't thrilled about going in the first place, and it didn't help that it was during the same weekend that I was co-hosting one of my best friend's bridal shower. To make a long story short, I wasn't sold on Kellogg yet.
Thanks to a few twists of fate and a completely understanding and supportive friend, I ended up spending the entire weekend in Evanston to see if I could imagine myself living there for two years. It wasn't an easy decision-- I felt horrible about missing such an important event for my friend, but honestly, I'm so glad I didn't miss DAK because it was the major turning point for me.
Here are a few things I learned that weekend:
1. Kellogg wasn't in Chicago! It was in Evanston, a town I had never even heard of until then.
2. It was clean and extremely beautiful.
3. Midwesterners are all SUPER NICE! (Seriously, even the bums are nice)
4. How Kellogg does such an incredible job embracing the JV community (JV= JointVenture aka significant others). There were so many separate activities I was involved in all weekend. If ever I needed a support group, this would be it. I liked all the girls I met, and I knew that being active in this type of community would help the transition immensely.
5. I could afford a nice apartment with a doorman. Yes, this was very exciting to me.
I could probably write a whole entry about my experience at DAK, but all you need to know is that I was sold. I fell in love with the campus, the community, and the whole Evanston vibe. Slowly but surely, Kellogg climbed its way to the top of the list.
As I grew more and more sure that Kellogg was the perfect place for us, it became easier trying to explain to people why we were leaving. Everyone had always said the same thing or something similar. We have a great life here. Scott is already an attorney and CPA. He's happy with his job, so why does he need an MBA? How could we leave our family? We'd hate the weather. And the list went on and on. I think a large part of why I felt so uncomfortable earlier on was simply because I wasn't even convinced myself that making this move was the right decision.
I'm happy to say that I no longer have doubts, and in fact I am even looking forward to it. I'm nervous and I'm scared, but find comfort in the fact that I am about to discover a brand new city that will ultimately become a part of me.
